those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize