He had one of those small greek statue penises
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
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