So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
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Drunk walkin through police station. America
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
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He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.