I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
Randomize
