Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
27 Times The Kardashian-Jenner Clan Absolutely Slayed at NYFW
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
19 Doctors Confess The Most Difficult Situation They’ve Ever Had To Face
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP