im drinking this country out of the recession.
Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
Randomize
