I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
Randomize
