I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
21 Ladies Confess The Grossest Things They Do When No One’s Around
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
23 Tweets I Thought Were Really Funny When I Was Drunk Yesterday
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho