I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
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he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
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They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.