Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
25 Facts Men Don’t Know About Women Until They Live Together
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
These 19 People Imagine Others When Banging Their SO
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.