What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
Randomize
