I think my fart just growled at me.
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?