Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
15 Ridiculous Ways Broke People Managed to Make a Buck
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
These 27 C*ck Blocks Are Savage AF
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe