there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
These 25 People Are Obsessed With Pizza
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
16 Sexual Experiences EVERYONE Should Have At Least Once
My tweets this weekend consisted of me telling every bar I went to that they were my favorite valentine. I've never felt like more of an alcoholic
50% drunk capacity currently
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?