I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
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