Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
My liver just had a heart attack.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am