Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
23 Proposal Horror Stories You Won’t Believe
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober