that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
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