My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever