naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
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