youre lurking in front of me
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
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