yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
that is very illegal...i love you.
Randomize