Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Randomize
