EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
You are a booty call, not a friend.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
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