dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
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