Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
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