Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had an old man tip me two dollars and say "here put this in your baby fund, you'll have a baby someday" I swear this is gods way of saying GET ON BIRTH CONTROL NOW!
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
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