So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
everyone is single if you try hard enough
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
Randomize