dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
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