he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
do herpes really smell.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
Randomize
