fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
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