Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (410): View more from Maryland

  You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (410): You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita http://tfl.nu/ih02
  Replies (5) Good night (590) Bad night (958) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (443): View more from Maryland

  when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (443): when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her http://tfl.nu/gfqm
  Replies (123) Good night (588) Bad night (2431) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (908): View more from New Jersey

  Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (908): Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too. http://tfl.nu/4y2n
  Replies (16) Good night (797) Bad night (3384) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (404): View more from Georgia

  I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (404): I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of? http://tfl.nu/2d4m
  Replies (21) Good night (596) Bad night (5158) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (203): he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave http://tfl.nu/v07m
  Replies (45) Good night (5450) Bad night (683) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (515): View more from Iowa

  I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (515): I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy. http://tfl.nu/r54x
  Replies (8) Good night (682) Bad night (5656) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (916): View more from California

  Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (916): Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents? http://tfl.nu/8kv6
  Replies (20) Good night (2399) Bad night (1208) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (917): View more from New York City

  Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (917): Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor. http://tfl.nu/lzwd
  Replies (10) Good night (3169) Bad night (751) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (802): View more from Vermont

  Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (802): Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester. http://tfl.nu/l7en
  Replies (1) Good night (1433) Bad night (535) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (714): View more from California

  the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (714): the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that? http://tfl.nu/e4u9
  Replies (19) Good night (2583) Bad night (572) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (214): View more from Texas

  i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (214): i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing. http://tfl.nu/q1z1
  Replies (11) Good night (2431) Bad night (435) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (703): View more from Virginia

  A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (703): A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall? http://tfl.nu/zs4k
  Replies (6) Good night (593) Bad night (304) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (479): View more from Arkansas

  Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.

  (501): View more from Arkansas

  Just skip

  (479): View more from Arkansas

  Please. i have SOME standards

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (479): Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day. (501): Just skip (479): Please. i have SOME standards http://tfl.nu/0muv
  Replies (0) Good night (668) Bad night (156)
• Favorite

  (780): View more from Alberta, CA

  I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (780): I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities. http://tfl.nu/3c8w
  Replies (2) Good night (233) Bad night (503) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (425): View more from Washington

  I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (425): I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits http://tfl.nu/tp61
  Replies (5) Good night (327) Bad night (185) Order T-Shirt

Randomize