no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
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