Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
At a bar in the city and the whole place starting singing “Happy Birthday” to someone. Everyone but me. The person next to me leaned over and said, “Why didn’t you sing along?!?” I responded, “I don’t know him. I don’t give a shit if he has a happy birthday.”
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
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