Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
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as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
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Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice