we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
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