just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
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