She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
Operation Purity has been aborted
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
Who are you, and why are you in my phone as Elf on the Shelf
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Randomize
