watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
You know you suck at relationships when you are sitting in the airport on Christmas day, alone, swiping on Tinder.
Randomize