hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize