Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
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Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My most recent midlife crisis involved eating a doughnut in 30 seconds but taking 5 minutes to do half a shot of whiskey, then deciding I wasn't going to finish it.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
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