I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
Randomize
