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Porn is love you can see.
There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
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