Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
Is Oprah even human
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
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