i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
Drake has all the answers
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
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