I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
