And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
Randomize
