I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
whose parrot is this?
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
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