i think my tv is drunk
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
maybe you met your husband and you just don't know it yet
and other hilarious jokes you can tell yourself
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
Randomize