Rock
Scissors
Fuck
The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
And I swear to god I'll divorce you if you so much as say a single sentence in Yoda talk in our bedroom. I may be a nerd but that's just fucking creepy
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
Randomize
