If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."