he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
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